Social Anxiety Therapy in California
Fear of judgment can make conversations, meetings, dating, or speaking in class feel threatening. Exposure-based CBT for social anxiety helps you approach these situations while addressing avoidance, self-monitoring, and repeated review afterward.
Matthew Baker, LCSW · California license #121926
Owner of Whatif Therapy, specializing in ERP for OCD, exposure-based therapy for anxiety, and Prolonged Exposure for adult PTSD. Based in Lakewood; secure telehealth throughout California. About Matthew and his training.
More than being shy
Social anxiety is a persistent fear of judgment, criticism, rejection, embarrassment, or humiliation in social situations. A social anxiety diagnosis is usually considered when fear and avoidance interfere with school, work, relationships, friendships, dating, or daily responsibilities.
Many people with social anxiety disorder want connection but feel stuck in self-consciousness and overthinking. You may wonder, “Why am I so awkward around people?” or “Why do I get nervous talking to people?” The problem is not a lack of character. The problem is a fear cycle that teaches your brain to treat social risk like danger.
Common fear themes
- Fear of being judged, criticized, rejected, or misunderstood
- Fear of saying something stupid, awkward, or wrong
- Fear of embarrassment, humiliation, blushing, shaking, or looking anxious
- Overthinking every conversation and replaying conversations in your head
- Worrying you sounded weird, looked stupid, or made a mistake
- Feeling afraid people are judging you, even when you want to connect
Signs of social anxiety
Thoughts
- I cannot stop worrying what people think of me.
- What if I embarrass myself or look stupid?
- What if I say the wrong thing and cannot recover?
- What if they notice I am anxious, awkward, or uncomfortable?
- What if I am rejected, criticized, or judged?
Body sensations
- Blushing, sweating, shaking, trembling, or feeling exposed
- Racing heart, nausea, tight chest, or stomach discomfort
- Mind going blank while talking, presenting, or answering questions
- Panic attacks before or during social situations
- Feeling tense, frozen, overly alert, or unable to relax around others
Behaviors
- Avoiding conversations, meetings, classes, phone calls, parties, or dating
- Rehearsing, scripting, over-preparing, or checking what you said afterward
- Staying quiet, avoiding eye contact, or giving short answers
- People pleasing, over-apologizing, or trying not to make mistakes
- Leaving early, using your phone to escape, or seeking reassurance
Social anxiety in daily life
Social anxiety often shows up in ordinary moments, not only major events. Treatment for social anxiety should focus on the real situations where fear, avoidance, and safety behaviors are limiting your life.
- Fear of speaking in meetings, presentations, or group conversations
- Anxiety talking to coworkers, classmates, strangers, or peers
- Fear of networking, job interviews, dating, or making plans
- Anxiety making friends or starting conversations
- Fear of being watched while eating, writing, walking, working, or performing
- Worry about making mistakes at work, school, or in relationships
Specific or broad social anxiety
For some people, social anxiety is focused on public speaking, dating, job interviews, presentations, or fear of speaking in class. For others, it spreads across most interactions and can lead to isolation, school avoidance, workplace social anxiety, or chronic social anxiety.
Social anxiety therapy is strongest when it identifies the feared situations, feared outcomes, and social anxiety behaviors that keep the problem going.
Social anxiety can look different by age
Social anxiety at work
Adult social anxiety may include fear of speaking in meetings, anxiety speaking up at work, fear of presentations, anxiety talking to coworkers, fear of networking, or fear of making mistakes at work.
Social anxiety in teens
Teenage social anxiety may involve anxiety making friends, fear of speaking in class, school anxiety and social anxiety, fear of being judged by peers, or avoiding activities because of embarrassment.
Social anxiety in children
Child social anxiety can look like extreme shyness, not talking at school, avoiding peers, refusing activities, or becoming very distressed when expected to speak. Parents may wonder, “Does my child have social anxiety?”
What keeps social anxiety going
Trigger
A social situation appears, such as a meeting, class, phone call, date, party, interview, presentation, or conversation with someone new.
Threat prediction
Your brain predicts embarrassment, rejection, criticism, humiliation, or judgment. You may become highly self-conscious and start monitoring your voice, face, body, and words.
Avoidance and review
You avoid, stay quiet, rehearse, over-explain, people please, seek reassurance, or mentally replay the interaction afterward. This can bring short-term relief but keeps social anxiety stuck.
Exposure therapy helps you practice social life differently
Exposure-based CBT for social anxiety is an active, evidence-based treatment. Exposure-based CBT helps you gradually face feared social situations while reducing the responses that try to prevent embarrassment, rejection, criticism, or judgment.
This does not mean forcing yourself into humiliating situations. Exposure therapy for social anxiety is structured, collaborative, and tied to your goals. The focus is participating more freely while allowing some uncertainty about how others see you.
Exposure-based CBT may include practice with:
- Starting small conversations without scripting every word
- Speaking up at work, school, or in group settings
- Letting pauses, uncertainty, and awkward moments happen
- Reducing reassurance seeking and post-event review
- Saying something imperfect and resisting the urge to fix it
- Attending social events without escaping early
- Practicing public speaking, presentations, dating, or networking in steps
Related concerns
Social anxiety can overlap with other concerns, including OCD, panic attacks, generalized anxiety, depression, perfectionism, illness anxiety, agoraphobia, and avoidance patterns. Treatment should look at the full picture rather than assuming every fear has the same cause.
Recovery is built through practice
Social anxiety recovery is not about becoming a different person. It is about managing social anxiety with less avoidance, less self-monitoring, and more willingness to participate in the life you want. Overcoming social anxiety usually happens through repeated, targeted practice.
Confidence usually comes after practice, not before it.
Evidence-based treatment for social anxiety helps you build new learning through real experiences. You practice approaching work, school, relationships, and everyday conversations with less avoidance and less mental review.
Matthew Baker, LCSW
I’m a California Licensed Clinical Social Worker who provides structured online therapy for social anxiety, OCD, specific phobias, panic disorder, illness anxiety, generalized anxiety disorder, PTSD, and related anxiety concerns.
As a social anxiety therapist, my work is active and collaborative. Sessions focus on understanding the anxiety cycle, building an exposure plan, reducing avoidance and safety behaviors, and helping you practice new responses between sessions.
Credentials and practice details
- California Licensed Clinical Social Worker, CA #121926
- M.S.W., California State University, Long Beach
- Advanced training in Exposure and Response Prevention
- Online therapy for social anxiety in California
- Exposure-based CBT for social anxiety in California
- HIPAA-compliant telehealth
- Aetna and private pay options
When related concerns need a different approach
Constantly editing a message or rehearsing until a conversation feels flawless may also involve perfectionism. If the goal is to neutralize an obsession through repeated reviewing, the OCD overview explains how the assessment differs.
How treatment is tailored to this concern
Practice participation, not perfect performance
Exposure-based CBT for social anxiety addresses feared predictions about judgment, avoidance, self-focused attention, and safety behaviors. Practice might involve asking a question without a full script or staying in a conversation without repeatedly checking how you sound. Review what you learned rather than grading whether you looked calm.
This differs from ERP for OCD, where response prevention specifically addresses compulsions performed in response to obsessions. See social anxiety exposure examples and anxiety before social events.
Appointments are 53-minute sessions through secure California telehealth. Review fees, eligible Aetna plans, and private pay, or discuss treatment fit and availability.
Social anxiety treatment questions
What is the best treatment for social anxiety?
The best treatment for social anxiety is usually evidence-based care that directly targets avoidance, safety behaviors, and feared social situations. Exposure-based CBT, exposure therapy, and CBT-based approaches can help people practice new responses instead of organizing life around fear.
How do I know if I need social anxiety help?
Social anxiety support may be useful if fear of judgment, fear of embarrassment, overthinking conversations, or avoiding social situations is interfering with work, school, relationships, dating, friendships, or daily responsibilities.
Do you provide social anxiety treatment for adults?
Yes. I provide social anxiety treatment for adults across California through secure telehealth. Therapy can focus on workplace social anxiety, fear of presentations, anxiety talking to coworkers, dating anxiety, public speaking, and relationship concerns.
Do you provide social anxiety therapy for teens or children?
Yes, when clinically appropriate. Social anxiety treatment for teens and children may focus on fear of speaking in class, anxiety making friends, school avoidance, fear of judgment, and parent guidance. Parents may also receive social anxiety parenting tips and support for helping a socially anxious child or teenager.
Will I have to do embarrassing exposures?
No exposure plan should be built around humiliation for its own sake. Exposure-based CBT should be collaborative, structured, and connected to your goals. The aim is new learning, flexibility, and less avoidance, not forcing you into situations you are unwilling to do.
Do you provide online social anxiety treatment in California?
Yes. Whatif Therapy provides online social anxiety therapy in California through secure telehealth. Online treatment can include exposure practice for conversations, meetings, presentations, dating anxiety, public speaking anxiety, and everyday social situations.
Approach social situations differently.
If social anxiety is shaping your choices, online exposure-based CBT can help you build a plan for reducing avoidance and practicing real-life change.
Serving adults, teens, and children across California via secure telehealth.
Related information
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